Perfectionism

Perfectionism or, more likely, pseudo-perfectionism, can be a condition of narcissists, who often create situations in which they are the center of attention. The narcissist’s attempts at being seen as perfect are necessary for their grandiose self-image. If they don’t reach a perceived state of perfection, they can feel guilt, shame, anger, or anxiety—believing they’ll lose the admiration and love of others. Examples of narcissistic injury due to perfectionism: failing exams, losing competitions, not getting or losing jobs, being left by a partner, being rejected by friends, losing arguments, receiving constructive criticism, and developing eating disorders (especially anorexia nervosa). Research indicates grandiose narcissists uphold a version of perfection, expect unreasonable things from others, and work toward unrealistic ambitions. And vulnerable narcissists intentionally foster an idea of infallibility while concealing flaws in order to appease others’ perceived demands.