Neurodivergence

DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender)

DARVO (Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender), coined by psychotherapist/ researcher Jennifer Freyd in 1997, describes manipulative tactics often used by abusers (“offenders”) to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and then shift the blame onto their “victims.” By denying their actions, attacking the person confronting them, and flipping the roles of victim and offender, the narcissist effectively redirects attention away from their own actions, avoids taking responsibility, and often causes the rest of us doubt, confusion, and stress. Freyd and her collaborator researcher Sarah Harsey published studies providing empirical evidence for how DARVO is used by perpetrators to harm and silence victims, including:

  • Established a link between DARVO and victim self-blame: A 2017 study found a positive association between DARVO exposure and a victim’s self-blame. The more DARVO exposure experienced during a confrontation, the more victims blamed themselves for the abuse.
  • Investigated effects on third-party observers: A 2020 report showed DARVO tactics successfully manipulate public opinion. Third-party observers who witnessed DARVO were more likely to doubt the victim’s credibility and perceive the perpetrator as less abusive and more believable.
  • Explored institutional DARVO: Research into “institutional DARVO” finds organizations engaged in DARVO tactics in response to reports of sexual misconduct. They also documented DARVO use in high-profile cases of public figures to evade accountability for abuse.
  • Found links between DARVO and rape-supportive attitudes: In 2024, Harsey’s landmark study revealed a strong link between DARVO usage, sexual harassment, and endorsement of rape myths. 

Experts highlight specific characteristics to determine if someone is manipulating you:

  • Denial: Offenders adamantly deny being wrong and won’t acknowledge destructive or disruptive behaviors. They don’t admit to being abusive but minimize victim’s feelings.
  • Attack: Offenders become aggressive, arguing they’re not in the wrong while casting doubt on those of us who question their behavior—making it look like we’re in the wrong. They attack our credibility, character, or motives, using insults, threats, gaslighting, or manipulation.

Reverse Victim and Offender: Offenders try to switch roles, arguing they’re the real victims and making victims look like the offender. They may claim to be unfairly accused, then assert we’re making accusations to cover up our behavior. This blame-shifting behavior helps them be seen in a more positive light, while inflicting mental and emotional pain on those of us experiencing abuse. They will also gaslight us, making us wonder if we’re crazy or think what we’re experiencing is not actually abuse. They will also deflect, trying to switch gears and remove attention from what they did

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